Relevant Reviews: Batman Incorporated #11

BATMAN INCORPORATED # 11 written by Chris Burnham, art by Jorge Lucas, colours by Ian Hannin

Yup, that’s right, a review of a comic ON THE DAY OF RELEASE! In Scotland, that is. Yon Americans got it yesterday, eh, the swines. Maybe if Scotland gains independence, our first act could be to change all that? I’m sure Alex Salmond’s working on a way to make that happen, as we speak.

Also yup, that’s ‘written by Chris Burnham’, not ‘written by Grant Morrison’. This initially saddened me, as I mainly buy this comic for Grant Morrison’s writing. It’d be wrong to say that Burnham’s art has not become an intrinsic part of the book’s appeal, though, so hey, why not give his writing a go? Burnham’s earned it.

So, did I enjoy this comic?

Oh mercy me, read on to find out!

(Expect spoilers, though nothing that’ll ruin anything, hopefully)

Good Buy, Comics

As the previous post about the ol’ Canucklehead (I bet he gave himself that nickname, like a prick) shows, my plan to only read interesting comics from now on has gone somewhat wrong. Also, the fact I have covered nothing but comics on this blog for quite some time makes me look like an uncultured swine; the writing itself makes me appear barely-literate.

Let’s write some more about the comics I’ve read recently, then! All of these were purchased by choice.

Not a library loan among ‘em.

They are:  Action Comics: Superman and the Men of Steel by Grant Morrison, Rags Morales, Andy Kubert and co
Legion of Monsters by Dennis Hopeless and Juan Doe              
Strange Embrace by David Hine
The Ultimate Gnatrat by Mark Martin

The Best There Is At What He Does

AND WHAT HE DOES IS ‘GROTESQUE OVEREXPOSURE’

So popular, this angry little badger.

In films? Wry point of entry,
a hunk of Canadian Muscle.

Comics?
Child of privilege,
mystery gone.
Impossibly hairy?
Ignore the murder,
he’s a hero.
Beast’s haircut,
It’ll grow back

Bub.

Two of these comics
I’d read before
but had forgotten this when I
got     them

from the
li   br    a

r

y

a    g     a    iiii   n.

Let’s bring this one in quickly.

Ninety is Fine-ty

I’ve come into contact with a whole load of potentially-great comics recently, which makes a nice change. It’s mainly a result of briefly being employed (I sold Action Skirts to men), and actually having disposable income. Therefore, I spent some of said income on things I actually wanted, instead of just taking Any Old Ultimate Shite out of the local library.

The problem is, three of the ‘graphic novels’ (trade paperbacks) I purchased, when read close together had such a powerful effect that I was sent swaggering backwards in time, to a kind of ur-90s, where anachronism was rife and the sun sheeeiiiiiiinnnned. So dazzling and confusing was this, that I had to leave reviewing these comics to the first of my contemporaries that I happened across, or they might not have been  done at all!

So, here to review TALES FROM BEYOND SCIENCE, ANIMAL MAN: BORN TO BE WILD and HEWLIGAN’S HAIRCUT, is my brief acquaintance and baffling 90s spirit guide, Trevor Never. While he types, I shall brachiate slowly back to 2013. Grumble. Any spelling mistakes or basic errors are his fault, as I won’t have time to edit it, being as I will be fighting against some manner of chrono-tides.

Take it away, Trevor:

Open the Door, Get on the Floor

I like Grant, I like Alan. I think Alan Grant’s okay?

Grant Morrison and Alan Moore, eh? Those zany wizards, s0 many drugzzz amirite lolll wehjiweghgheerhnjkgekjg

They are both excellent comics writers, with their own particular interests and writing tics, and I enjoy them both  (but I admit I much prefer Morrison’s comics themselves). They are each responsible for, in my opinion, some of the most downright human moments in genre comics, as well as the most exciting straight-up action and they’re inclusive and queer-positive and I feel they are often unfairly disregarded by comics fans who think they are FrEaKY old dickheads who don’t have the correct respect for Green Lantern’s balls.

I just made a strawman, in a similar way to how Yellow Lantern Scarecrow might make some construct out of his “is it still in continuity” fear-ring.

Anyway, I’ve pretty much read all the Big Works by these two writers, and a fair few small ones as well. ALSO MEDIUM ONES. But what about those ones that don’t see too much coverage, the ones that may have slipped under your radar, like a bit of butter under the fridge? Radar/butter/fridge, mixing those metaphors, making a Bullshit Cake.

WHAT ABOUT DINOSAURS VS. ALIENS AND THE WORM?!?!?

Yes.
In comparing ‘Dinosaurs Vs. Aliens’ and ‘The Worm’, I’m being like Alan Moore comparing Harry Potter to Performance, in the sense they really have very little to do with each other, so I am Pure Comics Zeitgeist, and as such, you basically owe it to me to read on.

Librebel

1. Go to library
2. Take out comics
3. Read comics
4. Remember that sometimes I read or write about things that aren’t comics
5. Write about comics
6. Use terrible, nonsensical pun as title

Five Extremes

After the pointless and self-destructive horror of ‘Ultimate Week’, wherein I forgot what I actually enjoyed about comics, why I read them in the first place, and what my eyes can handle before they just give up and see a brown sludge where once there was glorious colour, I decided “Only good comics for me from now on! Only the best! I’ll rediscover what this medium can do!”

Part of my subsequent rehabilitation has involved taking only interesting comics from the library. One of these is Young Gods and Friends by Barry Windsor-Smith. And while I’ve only just started reading it and am yet to form an opinion on the actual content, I’ve finished reading the introduction by Dave “Him” Sim, Rob Vollmar, Alan David Doane, Bruce Costa and “a guy signing himself Seriously pissed off joe“.

This introduction is full of the sort of yawny bleating you tend to see when anyone discusses ‘proper’ comics from the early 90s. “Oh woe was us, it didn’t do well, it’s not got superheroes, collectors ruin everything, if it ain’t got an ‘X’ then it ain’t sales, we are real artists, they are youngsters who like muscles and guns”. You know.

I mean, it’s basically true observations, but MY GOD this is a collection from 2003, yet it still sounds like a bunch of 45 year olds who’ve just seen a bit of Rob Liefeld pec for the first time.

Don’t start your collected edition with a big complaint that makes you seem as square and grey as the film 54!

Where’s the joy, huh? Where’s the celebration of what the non-superhero mainstream CAN do?

Oh well.

I mean, everything they say is correct, but it kills all my enthusiasm for actually reading the comic itself. So what did I read instead (assuming I had to read some sort of comic)?

THESE gems, which I found for 25p each in Oxfam (having failed to find the comics mart I was going to, which was no doubt populated with SPECULATORS who don’t like REAL comics crafted of MUD and BRICKS)!

So, pack away your sexual organs, place your guns and swords and gunswords in your pouches, leap from your helicopter on your tiny feet, and enjoy these reviews?